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God smites Tesco

ATHEIST writer Kurt Vonnegut Jr once created a character, allegedly based on Hemingway, for his play Happy Birthday, Wanda June. In it, the sexist buffoon Harold comes out with the following line:

 Educating a beautiful woman is like pouring honey into a fine Swiss watch. Everything stops.

I burst out laughing when I first read that quote way back in the early 1970s … and spent several guilty hours after regretting my mirth. But then I decided to adapt it to suit my own worldview:

Religiously educating a person is like pouring honey into a fine Swiss watch …

Fool in a frock slams gay marriage

IN A “State of the World” address, Pope Benedict the something-or-other has warned that the future of humanity is threatened by gay marriage.

According to this report, the posturing old closet case:

Unleashed what some consider being his strongest tirade against gay marriage, saying it is among conventions that ‘undermine the family’ and ‘threaten human dignity and the future of humanity itself’.

Pink bin fury

ZIMBABWE’S Roman Catholic President, a serial human rights abuser and who harbours a deep hatred of homosexuals, is apparently deeply upset by the appearance in Bulawayo of a bunch of pink garbage cans.

Donated to the Bulawayo council by lesbian and gay pressure group, the Sexual Rights Centre, the bins have caused a storm among Zimbabwean homophobes, chief among them being the ghastly tyrant Mugabe, who seems not averse to a touch of pink in his wardrobe, as the picture indicates. (See a video here).